Alf organizes a pensioners' outing,immediately falling foul of the bus driver as all the passengers have bus passes which delays the start. In the course of the trip Alf almost has a fight with an Irishman,directs all the ladies to use the gents' toilets to prevent queueing and is rewarded with a glimpse of the queen. Come evening all the pensioners are drunk and noisy, which leaves the driver dreading the trip back home.

The happy couple discuss their forthcoming wedding, a marriage of convenience in every sense as they intend to each remain in their own flat and the bride has no desire for sex,despite Alf's boasts about his youthful prowess. That night a terrible storm dislodges a box of money Alf has been hiding in the chimney. To Alf's annoyance Mrs Hollingbery claims half of it.

When Rita and Winston come in at night making a noise, Mrs. Hollingbery decides to start locking the front door of the flats at 10:30. But can Alf make it back from the pub in time?

Mrs. Hollingbery's obsession with locking doors takes on new dimensions when she even locks Alf into his own flat but then he needs to go to toilet. Meanwhile the shopkeeper wants to call in Elsa's debts, and the milkman has some news about her gambling

Alf gets fed up with everybody having a Sunday roast except him, so he makes his first trip to a supermarket. But he's forgotten he can't cook

Rita buys Alf a second-hand jacket, and when he notices it is covered in medals he uses it to try to gain all sorts of favours under false pretences. He also gets a visit from canvassing politicians.

Alf's old neighbour Min turns up uninvited with her senile sister

Alf tries the patience of good natured Fred Johnson and his wife from next door by using their phone to make a very long-winded long distance call to Rita. After expounding upon funerals in the pub Alf repays Fred by buying him so many drinks he falls over but Alf's homeward progress pushing Else in her wheelchair also ends in drunken calamity.

Rita comes to visit and no sooner is she through the door than Alf argues with her about Else. After Alf has criticised Margaret Thatcher,claiming that no woman should be prime minister,Else and Rita gang up against him with Winston,who brings an equally camp friend home to throw a party for Rita. Alf is given extremely strong drink so that,whilst the others continue carousing,he passes out.

Tired of pushing Else around in her chair Alf feels she should have an electric scooter but they cost two and a half grand and the woman at Social Security tells Alf that,as long as he is around to push,Else is ineligible. Taking an idea from some kids with a go-kart Alf adds jet propulsion to the chair,which goes out of control,foiling a bank robbery and landing him in hospital. He is declared a hero but,following Winston's view that the robbers' accomplices may be out to get him,decides to remain anonymous.

Rita has come to stay but announces her intention to go back home on Christmas Eve. In order to persuade her to stay and help him look after Else Alf falls off a ladder and claims to have injured his leg. However,whilst Rita does stay,the knees up at the Christmas Day party goes so well that Alf's enthusiastic participation soon exposes his supposedly bad leg as nothing more than a ruse.

When Rita wins a winter sun holiday abroad, Alf complains about having to spend Christmas alone.

Alf is spending Christmas in hospital for a hip replacement but his visitors' scare stories of what could go wrong propel him into fleeing from the ward dressed as a woman - which incurs a drunk's unwanted attention. Back at the house he is outraged when Mrs Hollingbery's sister turns up after his room,being told that he is not expected to live but all is forgiven when Mrs Hollingbery invites everybody upstairs for a Christmas party. Unfortunately he has forgotten the loose stair rod and ends up back in the hospital.

Facing another Christmas with a frugal dinner Alf cons the vicar into giving him a Christmas hamper but Mrs Hollingbery refuses to accept it because it has been dishonestly obtained. So Alf takes it to the pub to raffle,making sure that most of the slips of paper with the winning name on bear his. However he is outwitted at the last minute by the equally devious Bert Luscombe.

Following the non-wedding the happy couple hold separate receptions with their same sex friends but just before Christmas Mrs Hollingbery goes to confession,the priest telling her that she has wronged Alf and should do penance. To Alf this means cooking and cleaning for him and,to make her feel guilty,pretends he had booked a luxury honeymoon for them. Mrs H however rebels and,when the priest visits to make her do further penance,makes sure she gets her money's worth.